Up until now, I have been so patient with my creative process. I have intentionally not rushed it. This is mostly in an attempt to avoid overwhelm and the kind of friction that has lead to blow ups of epic proportions. Instead, I have found a balance between being tender and firm with my creative way of being. I have determinedly coaxed, cajoled, and wooed them out of hiding. It has been painfully slow and bit by bit, day by day, month by month, they’ve come out to play.
Having the time and financial resources to heal my creative wounds has been a process that, if nothing else, has allowed me to move forward unburdened by past failures. Mere weeks away from launching my first big creative project in six years, I am both hoping that it’s an immediate success and content knowing that it’s out there, even if I have to go seek out other work to pay my bills and pay off my debt.
All that being said, I was aware that, at some point, I’d have to turn up the heat. At some point, my creative way of being would be fortified enough that a bit more pressure would not only be something they can handle, it would be beneficial. Rigour, after all, is its own kind of cyclical conditioning mechanism. What’s more, it can be fun to push the limits of what we think is possible for ourselves and our creative work.
The original launch date for my class was September 8. When the stop motion portion of my class took longer to get through than expected, I toyed around with pushing the launch date back a few weeks. Then I was reminded that financially I couldn’t afford to launch it any later than the 8th. My initial response was to get angry and then panic. I had to draw on all the coaching work I’ve done over the past few years to avoid sabotaging myself and my project.
When I emerged from the fit I was having, I realized that my reaction wasn’t actually in line with my reality. It was simply a habitual response to an emotional uptick and the belief that things were worse than they actually were. For hours I reminded myself that “feelings aren’t facts” and that what I really needed to do was take stock of what was in front of me. From there I could figure out my next steps.
Not surprisingly, I was able to come up with a plan to get everything done by September 8 without sacrificing the quality of my work. The increased urgency I am feeling brought clarity to my plan and discernment to where my energy is most needed. It is thrilling and more of a gift than a disruption. This is it. I have two and a half weeks to get my project done and out into the world. I see now that this is what I’ve been preparing my creative way of being for all along.
So, how does more urgency help your creative process?